How Important Is Social Affirmation in Social Media to You?

This week at the Wisconsin Realtors Association’s Annual Convention, someone shared a

story over dinner that stopped me in my tracks. They had asked a person in their twenties what they were looking for in a partner. Without hesitation, the response was: 'social affirmations on social media.'

I’ll be honest—my immediate reaction was shock. Really?  Of all the qualities someone could value in a partner, that was the answer? At first, it struck me as superficial. But then, as I sat with it, I realized I might not be as far removed from that idea as I thought.

Earlier that very day, I had posted about something deeply personal: the loss of our beloved dog. It was one of the hardest things I’ve written, and while my intent wasn’t to seek “likes,” I can’t deny that I needed to hear from my friends. The words of sympathy, the small gestures of kindness, the affirmations—it all mattered. In that moment, it was healing.

So, was I also seeking social affirmation? Absolutely. And I’m not ashamed to admit it.

Social Affirmation in the Digital Age

What struck me is how this idea of affirmation has evolved with social media. Historically, affirmation was a nod, a handshake, a word of encouragement shared face-to-face. Today, it can come in the form of a comment, a reaction, or even a simple heart emoji. For some, it may feel like validation. For others, it’s connection. For all of us, it’s a reminder that we’re not alone.

Why It Matters

• It validates experiences. When we share something joyful or heartbreaking, affirmation reminds us that others see and acknowledge our feelings.

• It builds community. Those little notes of support—digital or otherwise—can create a sense of belonging that might not exist otherwise.

• It’s a double-edged sword. While affirmation can be supportive, it can also become something we rely on too heavily, shaping our sense of self-worth around how others respond.

  
  

A Personal Takeaway

That conversation over dinner forced me to pause. While I might not list “social affirmations on social media” as a quality I look for in a partner, I’ve come to realize it’s not as trivial as I first thought. We’re wired to crave affirmation. The platform may have changed, but the need hasn’t.

So, I’ll turn the question to you: How important is social affirmation in social media to you? Do you view it as superficial—or as something meaningful that connects us in ways we might not otherwise admit?